165 times
Clumsy socializing
165 ? Clumsy Socialite #1
Paranoy’s crimson eyes sparkled in the darkness.
Maybe it’s because of the orange pupils, but it’s quite scary to see at night. It also looks like the eyes of a wild beast are flashing.
In reality, the current paranoia is no different from a wild beast.
If you fail to please this guy.
This guy might run up to Luna, who he follows like an older sister, and say, “Luna! Hassan, that kid touched my thigh while I was sleeping…!”
Then I might get all my hair pulled out and kicked by Luna, saying, “Hassan, that’s too much!”
It was even more creepy because even the voices were reproduced so vividly, as if I had seen the future.
Is this the realm of the spirit of knowledge that I’ve only heard of? I’ve heard that spirit develops even more in critical situations. That’s exactly what happened to me just now.
Therefore, I have been racking my brains to dazzle Paranoy’s heart and mind in order to prevent such a future.
Sval, isn’t there a better way?
“Hassan, are you really Pluto’s son…?”
In that sense, Paranoy was walking towards a trap on his own. For now, it would be good to take advantage of this situation where Paranoy misunderstood me.
This guy has often mistaken me for being a socialite since the first time I saw him, and that helps me out in many ways.
So I asked my father and mother, who were somewhere in my hometown, to forgive me for pretending to be someone else’s son just for today. I’m sure they’d understand, since it was about protecting my son’s honor.
“Yeah, well, what is it? I’m actually Pluto’s son.”
As soon as I finished the sentence, regret came over me. I felt like I had to go this far, but at the same time, I wondered if Paranoy would be fooled by such a lie.
“Oh, as expected…! My judgment was spot on as expected…! I’m not stupid…!”
This is a lie.
Even Paranoy was amazed and impressed by his own uncanny insight.
When I saw her trembling, I felt like she was so moved that she might burst into tears at any moment.
“Hassan, then, why are you living among ordinary people like this? Why are you acting like a stupid Samaritan…?”
“You’re playing the dumb Samaritan?”
Subal, I was letting my guard down when I felt like I got hit with a powerful body blow to the forehead. That bastard Paranoy is secretly a strong opponent.
The most idiotic paranoiac thinks I’m a regular idiot Samaritan. I want to punch him in the face.
But if you easily fall for the provocation here, you might arouse Paranoy’s suspicion and end up saying, “Hassan, that’s too much!”
I have to protect my future family.
“That, that’s it. It’s all part of a deception tactic. It’s to fool the enemy.”
The more lies you tell, the heavier your shoulders and chest become. Is this the weight of the best?
Fortunately, Paranoy’s reaction is bright, indicating that my efforts were not in vain.
“Enemy…! Enemy of Lord Pluto! You were trying to fool those wicked Temple Knights! That was truly amazing acting…! Even I, Paranoy, one of Lord Pluto’s top followers, almost got fooled…!”
I’ve already been fooled into thinking that. Of course, Paranoy won’t know that. I’m still one step ahead of this guy.
But this kid, who kept converting and betraying whenever he got the chance, called himself the foremost believer of Pluto. He’s like some kind of Sval Nylon cult.
Of course, that’s not important right now.
I cleared my throat and muttered what was on my mind.
“Originally, true deception is to deceive your own troops before deceiving your enemies, Paranoy. Anyway, you figured out my true identity. You are truly a great believer.”
While emphasizing the word “prime believer,” I stroked the boy’s head. Paranoy’s crimson hair felt very soft to the touch, as if he was using good perfume.
Paranoia is at a loss as to what to do with my praise.
“Huhhh-. I guess I did well to pretend to betray Pluto-sama…. Was it true that the reason you didn’t say anything until now was because you were testing me…?”
“Yeah, that’s it. You could say it’s similar to that. Anyway, you passed.”
“Wow! I passed! I passed…!”
It was Paranoy who jumped up and down and screamed at the word that I had passed. I was so startled that I covered the little guy’s small mouth with my palm, wondering if Luna had woken up.
“Shh, shh-. Be quiet. This is a secret between you and me.”
Paranoy nodded at my words. When I let go of the guy’s mouth, he started whispering like a villain plotting something very bad.
“Does Lady Luna still not know…?”
“okay.”
“Indeed… You are using the tricks of the false prophet, one of the 24 secrets of Hell. If that is true, then the secret must not be leaked…”
“Lies what?”
“The 16th of the 24 great secrets of Hell. It’s called ‘The Tricks of the False Prophet’… Isn’t Pluto’s son a monster who can use the 52 great secrets of Hell?”
What the hell is that? It was supposed to be a 24-game draw, but why is the last one a 52-game draw? The more I talk, the more my head feels like it’s being twisted. It feels like my brain is being twisted.
Anyway, from what I understood, in Paranoy’s head, Pluto’s son was like a Kamen Rider who could use special moves.
Is Paranoia testing me? Are you making fun of me?
The 21st century society is a world dominated by media.
In my head, which was filled with all kinds of text, pictures, and visual media, the outline of Paranoy’s imagination as the son of Pluto, the descendant of the demon god, and the archduke of hell quickly took shape.
I guess you just have to act it out.
“Yes, the 24 Great Secrets of Hell. The Son of Hell, even when he lies, feels no pangs of conscience.”
“He is truly the most cruel and ruthless villain in the world. He is the epitome of a total thug…!”
What is this subal?
under-.
Honestly, I just wanted to get over this quickly and go to sleep. The most important thing right now is to tell Paranoy to keep quiet about what happened today.
“Paranoy, what happened today, and my identity, must remain a secret and never be told to anyone.”
“… Also to the same, fellow Pluto believers?”
“Yes, only you know. You, what is it? You passed my test and are now my right-hand man.”
“I, I am the right arm… . I am not Anxious, nor Somnia, nor Schizo, nor the captain, but I, Paranoy, am Hassan-nim’s right arm… ? I am so touched…!”
Paranoy seemed very surprised and impressed that he had surpassed other prominent cult priests to become my right-hand man. Just as I intended.
Paranoia asks a few questions as if curious.
“But what good is it if it’s your right arm? Are there any benefits…?”
Benefits? Benefits. Actually, that was an important topic. How much benefit would be good for someone who is the right hand man of Hassan, the Archduke of Hell?
“Hey, can I have some gold coins…?”
You want gold coins? I don’t have any of those.
So I racked my brain to figure out what would be the best excuse. Something that would get the 21st century college-educated Hassan’s brain working at full throttle.
I’m probably twice as smart as Paranoy, so I should be able to give a twice as plausible answer. My brilliant mind soon computed a plausible answer.
“To you, my right-hand man, what is that? Someday, when I become the ruler, I will give you 5 percent of the world I will rule.”
“… 5 percent of hell!”
Of course, that’s a lie. There’s no way I could become the ruler. This was a complete fraud using a false listing.
“If it’s 5 percent of Hell, that Paranoy could become a Baron, or rather a Count, of Hell…!”
But Paranoy is unaware of my thoughts and is happily thinking about the reward he will receive in the future.
I felt a little sorry seeing that.
In fact, I am not a son of hell or a monster with terrifying ultimate skills, but a common citizen Hassan who feels guilty while telling lies.
It turns out that not just anyone can do things like lying or doing bad things.
Still, I have to say what I have to say.
I add a few more words in a grave and eerie voice, like the son of a drunkard.
“But my right arm has a great responsibility. If you fail to keep the secret, you will be thrown into the darkest realm of Nox, deep in the depths of Tartarus.”
“Hee, heeeee… .”
Paranoy, who had been happy until just now, cowered in fear at my threat as if it were a lie.
I am glad that I learned about Pluto’s Labyrinth, Tartarus, the hell of this world, and the rulers of that realm while looking through the encyclopedia.
As expected, if you study, there will come a time when you can use it.
Now, the general story is over.
As I was about to fall asleep, I saw Paranoy blinking and looking at me.
“Go up to the second floor and sleep. Otherwise, is there anything else you want to say?”
“It seems that Pluto has indeed answered my prayers… .”
“pray?”
I wondered what she was going to say next. She was the nymph of the ditch water, rambling on and on without giving me a chance to ask.
“Every night, I prayed to Pluto while waiting for my mother in the cave. But after the first time he showed himself to me, I never received an answer… .”
Soon, large tears began to fall from Paranoy’s crimson eyes. The tears, reflected in the dim moonlight through the first-floor window, sparkled quite brightly.
In my mind, I pictured Paranoia hiding in a dark, gloomy cave. A nymph from my childhood waiting for her mother, who might never return.
In this world where there are many people who are after nymphs, this is a paranoia that hides from predators.
Wouldn’t Paranoy, crouching there, have been so lonely and scared that he would pray every night without an answer?
I felt that Paranoy was not a bad guy, even though he was stupid. If there really is a god, wouldn’t he have answered this guy’s prayer at least once?
I didn’t really have any feelings for the god Pluto. He was really a demon.
Of course, I’m not the one to argue.
I just touched the thigh of this innocent girl and tricked her. My heart is pounding and my face is burning hot. This is what it feels like to die. This is what makes a real villain.
Paranoy, unaware of my feelings, kept wiping away the tears that kept flowing with the back of his hand.
“But for His son to appear before me like this. It seems like my prayers so far were not in vain… . I can’t stop crying…!”
“Yeah, well, I was actually listening to everything. I was just busy. Hell is a place where dead people are flooding in, so there’s a lot of work to be done.”
“I see…! I, I am a top believer, so I actually knew everything…!”
Anyway, this is the end of the weird play in the middle of the night.
Paranoy takes a deep breath, his heart pounding with emotion calming down. He walks up the stairs barefoot to the second floor.
I was looking at his back anxiously.
I told you to keep it a secret, but Paranoy is a bit clumsy, so I’m not sure if it’ll be okay.
Would it be better to use amnesia like Hippolyta did to me?
But that’s really something like a forbidden secret, so it might erase not Paranoy’s memory, but Paranoy himself.
Then Paranoy looked back and said a word.
“I, Hassan… .”
“Why again?” Go to sleep.
“If you are truly Pluto’s son, could you show me your necromancy…?”
“Necromancy?”
“I want to see you wield the magic of death… Then I think I can truly believe that you are the son of God….”
What would people who are good at talking say at this point?
“Little nymph, greater blessings come to those who believe without seeing.”
“But… I feel like I’ve heard too many stories today that I can’t believe without seeing them for myself. I can’t seem to sort it out… ”
“Yeah, well. That could be possible.”
I rummaged through the bone jars on the first floor. They were filled with bones of some unknown animal, which Luna used to make some suspicious elixir.
I grabbed a handful of bones, placed them roughly on the floor, and said a word.
“…Get up.”
Then, with a clicking sound, the bones begin to fit together in strange ways.
It soon appeared in the form of a small child. What child? I was startled for a moment. The little nymph said a word.
“This goblin…! This is basic necromancy…! But you used necromancy so quickly without any other spells or magic circles….”
Paranoy trembled as if he was really surprised. I too was scared that someone else might see this scene and that Luna might catch him.
What would Luna think if she saw me using necromancy? Would she hate me for being a cultist? I guess I could just pretend it was voodoo. But I don’t want to take that risk.
“Okay, that’s enough.”
I swung my fist at the goblin or something standing on the ground. The 12-force punch shattered the bones into pieces and crumbled into a pile of bones.
“Hassan, I will work harder… .”
“No, you don’t have to work too hard. It’s not time yet. Until then, you have to crouch. Like a lion crouching in the bushes with its claws hidden.”
“lion….”
“Yes, a lion waiting for an opportunity. No breathing, no rustling. That’s it for us. Got it?”
I was a little worried that Paranoy might get into trouble because of his excessive enthusiasm.
So, I instructed the guy to do absolutely nothing and just live normally, as if he knew nothing like he did now.
“You are still a believer in the furnace. Act like it on the outside, even if it’s not true on the inside.”
“I, I understand… So you want me to extract information about the Knights of the Temple of the Hearth from the Temple of the Hearth. The Temple of the Hearth and the Knights of Jupiter are on friendly terms!”
“Yeah, that’s pretty much it. Anyway, this is the end of the story. Don’t bring it up anymore. That’s it.”
Paranoy pursed his lips as if he had something more to say. He seemed unable to contain his disappointment when I cut him off from the end of his story.
But my serious and solemn expression must have worked for him, because he soon climbed up the stairs and lay down on the blanket next to Luna.
Fresh root, fresh root.
Only after the little girls fell asleep, breathing evenly, could I finally sigh in relief.
Seriously, what the hell is going on in the middle of the night?
Mentally exhausted, I came down to the first floor, roughly spread a blanket on the floor, and lay down on it.
As I tossed and turned to fall asleep, something sharp kept touching my back, which was uncomfortable. Is the whole world out torment me?
Of course, that’s not really the case. It’s probably because I didn’t have time to clean up the traces of the goblin or whatever I just destroyed.
“…Get up.”
I sat up straight and just muttered to myself.
Then, something bulged out from under the blanket, and soon took the shape of a small ghost.
Click, click.
It was a terrifying sight. The eye sockets of the skull, made up of bones connected together in a jumbled manner, had a bluish glow that was creepy.
“Get in there. The jar over there.”
Click.
The guy listened to me and put his body back into the jar that was full of bones.
“Now, disband.”
Pass-.
Soon, there was a loud noise of bones scattering in all directions. Without having to break them with your hands, you just need to give the order to disperse and they will break apart on their own.
Damn, honestly this is fucking amazing.
It would be good to research in various ways.
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